AFTER a rough year, we could all use a good laugh.
To tickle your funny bone, Kate Docherty has pulled together some of the best – and corniest – jokes from 2020.
From the pandemic to royals to Brexit, find the year as told in gags.
Q: What happens when people refuse to social distance?
A: It’ll all end in tiers.
Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: Because the other chickens weren’t wearing masks.
Q: What song did the World Health Organisation play when it discovered dogs can’t spread Covid?
A: WHO let the dogs out.
Q: Who do Santa’s helpers call when they’re ill?
A: The National Elf Service
Q: What’s the difference between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer?
A: The taste.
Q: What does Miley Cyrus have at Christmas?
A: Twerky!
Q: Why did Princess Leia contract Coronavirus?
A: Because she went to woo Han.
Q: What do you call a 17-year-old with Covid?
A: A quaran-teen
Q: What do you not bring to a house party in 2020?
A: A case of Corona
Q: What does the italian outbreak have in common with spaghetti hoops?
A: They’ve both been pasta round.
Q: Why did the chicken not want to self-isolate?
A: Because he felt cooped up.
Q: Why can’t you eat sourdough bread with a curry?
A: It’s a naan-starter
Q: Why should Roy Hodgson be made Prime Minister?
A: Because he has a fantastic record of leaving Europe swiftly.
Q: Why does Boris Johnson like tea so much?
A: Because tea leaves.
Q: Why does Prince Harry like going to the dentist?
A: Because it’s the only place he’ll get a crown.
Q: What does Donald Trump do after he pulls a cracker?
A: Pays her off.
Q: What does the Queen call her Christmas Broadcast?
A: The One Show!
Q: How did the candle get fit?
A: He started doing Joe Wicks.
Q: Did Rudolph go to home school?
A: No. He was Elf-taught.
Q: Why does Kim Kardashian hate Christmas so much?
A: She’s always the butt of the Christmas cracker jokes
Q: Why has Boris Johnson bought mistletoe this year?
A: Because he’s tired of being in the single market
Q: Why has Phillip Green cancelled his Christmas nativity play?
A: No prophet
